Things are "heating" up

Sometimes I slay myself with my razor-sharp wit. Take the title of this post, for instance. It has nothing to do with the weather, a malfunctioning thermostat, or the state of the relationships in this family. No, this has to do with that beautiful creature gazing at you from the header up there (and just in case you're reading this in a feed reader.... or eons from now when this blog has undergone a major image revision, I am referring to our Great Dane, Rory, who just turned a year old 2 weeks ago.) Yes, my "little girl" became a woman this week. *sniff, sniff* Believe me, it was much easier reaching this milestone with my eldest child than it has been with a canine. Oh my stinkin' heck.

If you've never experienced the joys of doggie estrus, consider yourself blessed. Maybe if I had a toy poodle, it would be easier. Actually, I know it would. I remember the little "Sani-Panties" my sister put on her dog. I had no such option for My Little Pony, as one of my neighbors affectionately refers to her. My choices at the local PetSmart were either a disposable diaper, or a denim "diaper garment" in which you insert what looks remarkably similar to your grandma's maxi-pad. OK, probably not Grandma's, cuz they're "beltless." Let's go for your mom's. One scrawny little adhesive strip down the middle of the backside. Which to choose?

We began with the "diaper garment." Reading the boxes, I had to choose between one sized for a weight ending at 90 pounds (XL) or one beginning at 90, and recommended for Great Danes (XXL). Rory is a little over 90 pounds, so I went with the second. (Insert annoying buzzer sound here.) She is so svelte that it's really rather baggy on her and I have actually had to wash it several times because it just doesn't provide enough "protection," if you get my drift. So I went back to the store and decided to try the disposables. First size I try (Large) is too small. Then I get the largest size (XL, up to 90 pounds) and it's still too flippin' small.... They just don't come far enough up her back to fasten them. So the solution I have come up with? "Diaper garment" with disposable diaper as liner instead of the maxi-pad. It appears to be working.

Note to self: Schedule Rory's spay appointment.

***********************************************

In other news, the boys headed off in the RV this afternoon for a manventure. It was originally supposed to have been all of us, but I thought it would be better to keep Rory at home in her current condition. The boys had been looking forward to going, so Brian decided he could handle it alone. This trip was to a nice RV park almost 2 hours south of here. They even took Campbell with them. From the last conversation I had with them tonight, it sounded like they were having a good time. They'll be back tomorrow afternoon/evening.

Happy Valentine's Day!

Wishing you showers of love from above and here on earth.

Do you ever find yourself in this dilemma??

If you enjoyed that, here are a few card sentiments from Hallmark's dysfunctional section. (Angie, these are for you!).

1. I always wanted to have someone to hold, someone to love. And
now that you've come into my life.... (Inside card) - I've changed my
mind.

2. I must admit, you brought religion into my life.... (Inside card) - I
never believed in Hell until I met you

3. As the days go by, I think how lucky I am.... (Inside card) - That
you're not here to ruin it for me.

4. Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go.... (Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back? You'll probably need it again.

5. Someday I hope to marry.... (Inside card) - Someone other than
you.

6. Happy Birthday! You look great for your age.... (Inside card) -
Almost lifelike!

7. When we were together, you said you'd die for me.... (Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise.

8. We've been friends for a very long time.... (Inside card) - What do
you say we stop?

9. I'm so miserable without you.... (Inside card) - It's almost like
you're still here.

10. Congratulations on your new bundle of joy.... (Inside card) - Did
you ever find out who the father was?

11. You are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there
was only one life jacket.... (Inside card) - I'd miss you terribly and
think of you often.

12. Your friends and I wanted to do something really special for your
birthday.... (Inside card) - So we're having you put to sleep.

13. Happy Birthday, Uncle Dad! (Available only in Arkansas, Mississippi, and West Virginia)

14.Looking back over the years we've been together, I can't help but
wonder.... (Inside card) - What was I thinking?

15. Congratulations on your wedding day!.... (Inside card) - Too bad no one likes your husband